What's in one's nature

Last night hubby and I was at a gospel concert, Oslo Gospel Choir, very christmassy event, and they're very good! The concert hall was chock-a-block - for the third time that day ( = 1,600 x 3), so you could say they're rather popular...

Sometime in the middle of all this singing and rejoicing, the conductor told us of a "gospel church" in Chicago that he's visited on a number of occasions. And asked us to participate a little more - urging the soloists on, that kind of thing. And we weren't asked to go out there and be outrageous, or anything like this, just clap a little more spontaneously and at "odd" times  :)

Now, I will remind you, good people, that this was all happening in Norway. And for Norway, the audience was excellent - ecstatic, almost. But now - participating more? Even though I wanted to, I found I couldn't do it. I mean, really couldn't. It was impossible _and_ embarrassing. Though I was happy enough that other people were at it, wholeheartedly!

It were as if I'd been asked to walk on my hands. Naked. 

Every reason I couldn't do it... 

And it wasn't like dancing - I really couldn't dance to save my life, but secretely I wish I could - this was different, I really had (and still have!) no idea how to do it or what to do or when or... 

I guess it just isn't in my nature... 

(Drawing: Erich Heckel, Handstand (Acrobat), 1916)

The sound of winter

The day before Christmas (over here that means 23rd) there was still no snow, but frost had settled everywhere, making for a beautiful landscape. And trudging around in our garden the characteristic (to me) sound of winter appeared. You'll hear it too ... shhhh...

Norway really isn't that bad either... II

On the way down to the sea are some of my favourite houses. I wouldn't mind any of these... And then the building with the best view of all - a carport!

Norway really isn't that bad either...

Today - apparently - it's the warmest June 8th since forever around here. That is, since they started writing it down back in 1811 or something. It's been 31º C (87.8 F) in the shade. And in case you're wondering - that's not normal for this place... Even midsummer. The kids are outside, running through the neighbour's sprinkler and having a blast. Ice creams are consumed by the dozen. (Well, there are 7 kids here, mine and two friends...)

A couple of days ago I took a walk down to the sea, a little early for a proper sunset, but still a gorgeous night for a walk! Unlike southern Europe et al, the sun takes a long time to set here, and it doesn't get properly dark again until September-October (I've already forgotten, see?). In Lofoten, of course, the sun doesn't set at all between late May and late July. Can't wait to go back there :)

Walking back up from the sea (pretty steep path for an old woman like me...) I hooked up with another walker, a young man in his twenties, pretty cute... He started talking, and as the climb more or less took my breath away, he kept up the talk. And when we reached the road, we both talked... He was just really nice, told me about his daughter, about how long he'd lived here and how much he liked it here. It's just very un-Norwegian to start talking to someone like that, but it made the walk even more pleasant.

Next time I'll take hubby down for the same walk, if only someone would babysit. Maybe my new friend and his daughter?

To make a short story really long...

What I want is your help to translate a (very!) Norwegian expression. It literally translates as "good day man, axe handle" -- but as this isn't particularly explanatory (I'd imagine!) I'll have to provide you with the entire folk tale where this comes from. Sorry guys...

“Good day to you!” – “Axe handle”
Once upon a time there lived a ferryman who was so deaf he could neither hear nor gather what anyone said to him. He had a wife, two boys and a small girl, and they took no heed of him, but lived happily as long as there was something to live on, and after that they bought on tick from the innkeeper and every day was a party.
When noone would vouch for them in the end, the bailiff was coming to pledge for as much as they had borrowed and wasted; so the wife and children went to stay with her relatives, and left the deaf man stay behind to meet the bailiff.
The man went about his business, and he wondered what the bailiff would be asking him, and what answers he should give.
“I will start making something”, he said to himself, “then he will ask me about that. I will start whittling an axe handle.
He will ask me what I’m making; and I will say:
“Axe handle”
Then he’ll ask me how long it will be; and I will say:
“Up to this twig”
Then he’ll ask me where the ferry lies; and I will say:
“I was going to tar her; she’s lying on the beach with cracks in both ends”
Then he’ll ask: “Where’s your grey mare?” and I’ll say “she’s carrying, due any minute”
Then he’ll ask: ”Where’s your cattle, and your summer cowshed?” And then I’ll say:
“It’s not far at all; when you go up that hill, you’ll be there in no time”
And he thought this was a cunning plan.
Verily, after a short while the bailiff showed up. But the ferryman had been to see the innkeeper, and had a few drinks, before his arrival. “Good day to you!” the bailiff said.
”Axe handle” the ferryman answered.
”Is that so” the bailiff said. “How far away is the inn?” he asked.
“Up to this twig”
The bailiff shook his head and stared at him.
“Where’s your wife, man?”
“I was going to tar her; she’s lying on the beach with cracks in both ends”
And where’s your daughter?
“she’s carrying, due any minute” the man answered; truly content with his answers.
“Oh, go to --, you’re such an ass!” the bailiff said.
“It’s not far at all; when you go up that hill, you’ll be there in no time”, the ferryman said…

So -- the expression is used if someone's answers are worse than a shot in the dark... If I ask you what the capital of Ireland is and you answer "11", or I ask you what you think of blogging and you answer "very well, thank you"... Is there an English idiom covering this? (One dictionary has "at cross purposes" but that's not the same - this is really without purposes...)

'nother fun exercise!

Yes, we're back... And here's proof of our wintery disposition - me on the toboggan with Filip. And yes, that's yours truly creating the soundtrack ;) Filip will no doubt grow up to be a rally driver. Phew, I'm just glad we managed to stop before actually hitting those people. Truly, we were inches away from the heads of happy picnickers...

(Incidentally, the people standing in the middle of the photo to begin with has nothing to do with us...)

Beautiful spring morning in Oslo

Brought the camera to town Friday morning, and took a few photos on my way to work. It's not Porto, it's not Lisbon, but it's not all that bad when the sun is shining...
Nobel Peace Prize Centre
Fishing boat just come in

Aker brygge area
Oslo City Hall
Akershus fortress
Soldiers going to work at Akershus
Spring cleaning
Tordenskiold, naval hero and somehow related to me :)
No, it's not your eyes, it's the 300 year-old gate!
Oslo Stock Exchange

HAHA - that's positively hilarious!!

So the photo below will be changing as the days go by -- this one above will - hopefully - stay the same... It's from today at 11:30 AM. Now - satisfied, y'all? It ISN'T that dark...

UPDATE!! (was: "the polar night?")

Really, Rarity - as a Norwegian you should have known there was something wrong...

My below post was written exactly to show you how dark it ISN'T in daytime "polar night" -- but then, apparently, I must have linked to the actual webcam, and not to the photo from 11:18 --- thus giving you exactly the impression of dark as I wanted to rid you of...

I think that's precious...

Well, when daylight hits again, provided there's no rain etc. etc. I'll try to give you a static photo next time, to show you what I mean.. (Yes, if you double click the photo below you may be able to detect the time on top of it - saying, e.g. 23:20 - an hour in which darkness will reign in most hemispheres...)

****
This is right now (11:18 AM) in Henningsvær, Lofoten


So - the sun disappeared December 5th, to come back January 6th. But it's not that dark, is it? People (including Norwegians from further south...) tend to think it'll be pitch black all day. I just thought I'd show you that it isn't. Or - it doesn't have to be. (Whether it's there or here it will be dark and gloomy in bad winter weather...)

Traditional "julebord"

Julebord = [literally: Christmas table] Christmas party, Christmas dinner. Usually with colleagues, sometimes with friends. Sometimes with Christmassy food, sometimes not.

You haven't had a traditional Norwegian Julebord until you've been totally plastered / sloshed / [fill in equivalent of choice], told off your boss in public (just before you barfed at his shoes), made out with his / her spouse in the back room and shown up at work at noon the next day (to find noone arrived before you) with a severe headache and total amnesia.

Ours was last night.

But it wasn't that bad. Really. And I don't drink*, so I was fit as a fiddle this morning --- inasmuch as I'm ever really fit for anything at any morning... (I remind you that Oscar Wilde spoke the truth about this: "Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast".)

I had my fears, before it all began.

Firstly I hate having to dress up. Always have done. I feel like a transvestite! Only I don't look as good. I'll see if I can't find one of those lovely photos taken of a very grumpy me at some stage.

Secondly, as I mentioned, I *don't drink*. Well, it happens, and it's not a principle. But I don't like the taste of beer, or most wines or spirits, so I much prefer a traditional coke... (I do like stuff like cider, but we haven't got that here, so it was me and the waitress keeping up the sober rate.)

Thirdly, we were going to start the thing off by "playing games" at the office. Adult games usually involves a great deal of drinking and not much sense. Actually, this one wasn't so bad: Everyone had brought 2 presents, and we threw dice about who got what, then "stole" them off eachother with a lucky 6 etc. But I didn't get what I most yearned for:

The USB Hamster Wheel

The faster you type, the quicker the hamster runs. (And no, it's not a real one, animal lovers...)

Then we were off for the meal. Excellent food (five courses - none of which had anything to do with Christmas, luckily), good company, general goodmoodiness (is that a word?) and less inebriety than expected...

Tonight it's hubby's turn - and then we won't have to do this for another year...

Norway on the map - again?!

And it's not even December 10th!*

Merujo told me Norway's the "Place of the Week" at National Geographic.

And Washington DC's celebrating Norwegian Christmas for the 10th time. And my Canadian friend R suddenly told me they eat lutefisk at Christmas. (No, they're not Norwegian Canadians..)

Is the world going Norwegian on me??


*When the Nobel Peace Prize is given out.

Since you've asked...

The aforementioned "Norwegian toffee cheese" has nothing to do with cheddar. Or toffee, for that matter. It's a kind of goat cheese. Except some types haven't got goat's milk anymore... We usually call it "brown cheese", very inventive! No, I think - if you really want an explanation, go to THIS place. And I'll just mention briefly, in passing, that on average, every Norwegian eats 2 kilos (4 lbs) of this cheese every year. We eat 3-4 kilos a month in my family. Hubby rarely eats it, so that leaves about 7 kilos (?) each to the rest of us... Yummy :)

If you come over, I'll be serving waffles with brown cheese...

Oh, and the other invention? The paper clip. Really puts Norway on the map, that one ;)

Scandinavian relations

Some of you were interested to know about Scandinavian interrelations. Well, I'm Scandinavian, so if you don't mind my lumping all Norwegians together and calling my humble opinion universal, well then, I'm off..

Firstly, Scandinavia. It's actually only Denmark, Norway and Sweden (listed alphabetically to avoid accusations of bias, ok?). If you add Finland and Iceland it'll turn out as The Nordic Countries. To us, that is. The rest of you still call it Scandinavia. (It's just the same that happened when a Norwegian I know (of) went travelling around the world, and although he insisted he was called Njål (...) people would say stuff like "that's all right, we'll just call you Bob!".. Digress? I wouldn't dream of it. )

Norwegians, on the whole, possibly spoiled by the ridiculous amount of money the oil's pouring into this country (if not into its inhabitants' pockets), tend to be rather optimistic. I was going to say joyful, but that's an exaggeration. It's more like kiddies' optimism. Only with a poker face. It's not true that Norwegians don't smile. They do. Just look: It's just that when you wear a woollen hat 9 months a year it doesn't show.

Norwegians are very proud of Norway ("didn't the UN just say that we were the best country to live in, again, this year?"), but we're not proud of things Norwegian. We mostly don't feel very attached to the old Norwegian culture at all, except for the bunad-wearing on the 17th of May and the Christmas lutefisk. Traditional dancing and music is very much a rural thing, and we'd rather talk about Madrugada, a-ha or Sondre Lerche... Or Sweden, actually - they've got Volvo, IKEA, Sony Ericsson - Abba, Roxette - Bjørn Borg, Tre Kronor ice hockey team, and a national side in football that's not just in various world cups, but doing well at it.

So, the further away from Norway we are, the more "uni-Scandinavian" we are - sure we can take credit for IKEA and Olympic gold winning olympic teams... Closer to home, we make fun of the Swedes, we have jokes about eachother, we claim they're a rather stupid people. But secretly, or not so secretly, they're the big brother we're really proud of, still rather annoyed at, for being so much better than us at everything... And they've got Astrid Lindgren.



We've got Swedish programmes on television and a lot of Norway has access to Swedish channels as well. Most Norwegians understand any given Swedish dialect on any given day. Swedes won't even try understanding Norwegian, so as soon as the border's crossed (- you can cross into Sweden a million places along the border, only a few are watched) Norwegians change into Norwedish, which is more easily understood, and which gives the Swedes the feeling that they do, after all, understand Norwegians...

Denmark will be dealt with later ;)

Wow - there really is a connection!

I wrote a post recently on my Greek blog about Henrik Ibsen, this year being the centenary of his passing away and all.

Now it turns out Ibsen & Greece go together like ham & cheese! Palin & Cleese! Jason and The fleece! My nephew and niece! (I admit, I did find a rhyming dictionary...) But I'm not just making this up to get a chance to throw rhymes at you. No - the Norwegian embassy in Athens has Ibsen & Greece all over its homepages and there is actually a lot of Ibsen action going on in Greece too, this year...

There's too much to actually type it out, but for a list of rare moments of Norwegian culture in The Capital of Culture (my titling...) you can check out this list. Or not ;)

17th of May - our national day

May 17th is our national day, Constitution day. In memory of the signing of the Constitution in 1814 (on the 17th, as you may have guessed..). You can find a detailed (and rather boring, but very factual) description of it here. A lighter version, with photos right here! But basically it's celebrating how we broke free from the Danes after about 400 years of them ruling us, and conveniently not celebrating how we at the same time entered into a union with the Swedes.. (That ended in 1905 though, there was much ado about that last year!)

From about 1860 or so the national day has been celebrated with lots of flags, ice cream, cakes, hot dogs children's games and, not least, children's parade. Every school has a marching band, and schools most places parade alone or in twos and (like here) with kindergartens. In Oslo there are lots of schools going together, marching past the royal palace, where the royal family are out on the balcony waving at their subjects for four or five hours... (Incidentally, I think all Norwegians own their own flags, and waving them or putting them up outside your house is not considered nationalist behavious, unlike e.g. in Sweden. We do that on birthdays, flagdays, happy days, for funerals etc.)

The photos at the right are from breakfast one 17th at my friends' house - the date spelled out with bread and rolls - before my married life began... In the middle - some friends in national costumes, "bunad", I'm not there, but I've got the same kind as the three in the middle. Further down, tiny photo, me and S in front of the palace - passing it at least three times by infiltrating the children's parade was our least effort in the years after moving south... Last photo is M, on the left, for once keeping her eyes open when being photographed..

Further down: quite a few years back... Me with a friend, me with my big sister, me with plastic trumpet, me smiling bravely in that dreadful headscarf... I was only 4 1/2, it wasn't my fault!

Anyway. It's a lot of ironing shirts and keeping clothes nice until the parade starts, a lot of waving and shouting hip-hip-hooray! while parading, a lot of eating, generally, going on all day. And unless you're having a barbecue with family and / or friends at night, actually a rather boring afternoon ahead, but not so this year, Champions league final was on :)

Viking blood?

With the snow falling a few days ago, and Rarity's post on Norwegian hostile winter behaviour (and not least her commentators' reactions!), I started thinking why we're really like this. I mean - winter, who's it for?

Ok, give me a sunny, still winter's day, with around -5 C (I haven't got any idea what that'd be in F...), and bright, white snow all around, I can handle that. Sure, it's beautiful, picturesque and all that, and I know how to dress for it... But it's rarely like that, isn't it. There's Sleet, Slush, Ice and their cousin. And I loathe it. (Having to dress 5 kids to go out in it every morning has not, funnily enough, changed that attitude.)

Hey, I even grew up north of the Arctic Circle, you'd think I'd wallow in degrees below freezing point!

Admittedly, some people do. Like my cousin - she lives further north than were we grew up, and they may have snow from October to May! So where do they go for summer holidays? Their destinations vary. It's Canada (read: northernmost areas), Greenland (sic!), the Alps and other Norwegian mountains that are covered in snow all year round... But always, of course, skiing holidays. They must be "realler" Norwegians than me, who prefer a beach in Greece any day...

Can you imagine the vikings, on their way to some joyful pillaging and raping and what not, would stop because of a few snowflakes? And say, no, it's getting a tad chilly, let's go back to our cozy huts and wives and ...

There wouldn't be that many blond Irishmen around if they had, now, would it? ...