17 March 2007

Technological coming out

I'm thinking of a friend tonight. A lot. Earlier today, he finally told his sister he's gay. How? He'd set himself as "in a relationship" in his networking profile somewhere, and his sister finally stopped by today. (His friends have known about it all along - but his friends & family don't mingle.) He's been seeing someone for six weeks or so, and set his profile for his sister to see. I believe he did so February 18th, I seem to remember that.

And today, she stopped by. Saw his new status. Emailed him about who it could be, either of the network (girl)friends? She even started naming them, could it be this one, this one? He told her to think creatively. And finally gave her the link to his blog. Where all is revealed. All his thoughts around this subject for the past few years.
She said the family had sort of known, only hadn't wanted to believe it. They probably thought he'd grow out of it... She said that she felt sick. I imagine my friend felt worse. I hope he'll be alright. I wish I lived a little closer, only that wouldn't help - he'll have to go through this no matter what. At least he's got a sweet boyfriend. And I think his family will be alright about it. In the end. Let's hope soon.

On the bright side, Sweden just decided gays can get married in church. So there's hope :)


d. chedwick bryant said...

I don't understand why she felt sick. it is 2007.
I grew up around gay couples though, so to me there is no difference, love is love.

Claire said...

Good for him! In the meantime, I'm sure he'd appreciate whatever support you can give even if it's just some email or a phone call.

kimananda said...

What's the status on same-sex marriage in Norway? Here in DK, marriage is o.k., but not in church, so maybe like it was before in Sweden?

Moncrief Speaks said...

I feel sick that she felt sick. Who are these people?

Scholiast said...

Kim - I think we've got the same as Denmark. Which is the same as marriage except three "tiny" issues:
- it's not called marriage (it's called registered partnership)
- you can't get married (ok, registered) in church and
- you can only adopt eachother's kids, not open adoption as it were. But they're working on it (in parliament, I mean).

y'all - I'm thinking (hoping!) it's the shock (even though the family had kind of suspected...) rather than actual disgust that brings around this nausea... In which case it'll pass pretty quickly, right? And they'll be happy to meet his boyfriend?

Yvonne said...

I hope your friend's family have got over their initial fear. It is sad that in 2007, people are still getting reactions like that when they come out.

He might find this idea useful:

When I come out, to any degree I do so to make a relationship more real not in order to talk about my sex life. It maybe painful yes, maybe a relief, maybe at the risk of violence but coming out shines a very intense light on our relationships. The person I am talking with has a chance to get to know who I am.
-- Nathan Foster